Taking the test


Yesterday was my first appointment for my two three hour tests. Unfortunately, I could not take the day off from work, so I had to work afterwards as well.

I never like doing tests. They make me nervous, unsure and I keep doubting everything I do. Even hours after the test I was still going over it in my mind. Thinking of the stupid mistakes I made. This test wasn’t one that would give me good grades. After the two testing days, I will be awarded with a diagnose. One I may fear, one that may help me… But it was an exhausting day, that’s for sure!

It started with Pdoc F. asking me why I was there. I am not sure why she asked me, she obviously knew already, but wanted to hear it from me. Maybe it’s also to see how I formulate things, how my mind works and how I see things. Then we talked about my education and work experience. After that we talked a bit about my living situation. And then, the tests started (but I still think that talk before was the start of it already).

The bad thing for me is, I can read upside down very easily. But not when Pdoc scribbles and keeps papers pointed towards her. So I could not follow anything she was writing, making me very curious. Of course I will see all the results in the end, but still, I am a curious person. I want to know if I am doing things right, if there is a right way and what the test is really for. Because this day was build up with a lot of different tests, following each other.

There were tests to check my knowledge of words. Whether I could explain them, see similarity in some and so on. I got to “play” with blocks. I had to make the same image as was shown to me, using the blocks. When I was at school, I used to draw a grid in the image so it was easier… I wasn’t allowed this time. It was hard. I could feel a headache building up with the passing of each test. In the beginning F. had the lights on. But it reflected to brightly on the papers I needed for some tests, she turned them off for me. This was very nice for my head and I was glad she kept the lights out for the remaining time.

I was allowed a ten minute break after two hours. It was very welcome. I spend most of the time walking outside, enjoying the sun, hating my headache and dreading the rest of the tests and the work I still had to go to after this all. And I found myself really happy, thinking about the next three hour test day, knowing I would have that day off then. Besides, it will be my first day off since the end of April, so I think I also deserve it.

After my short break I went back inside for another hour of tests. My headache was really wearing me down and I couldn’t stop thinking about some answers I gave, knowing now they were wrong. I know it wasn’t a right-wrong test, at least not set up for that purposes, but I still felt bad about it.

After all this, I went home. I had about 15 minutes to relax before getting in the car and going to work. Work was warm and difficult to concentrate. I was very happy when I could get back into the car and drive home. My headache is still here and I have a slightly swollen throat now as well. I really don’t want to work now. I want to relax, think things over and just don’t do anything beside that… But unfortunately, I do have to work, I do need the income. But I have decided to ask some extra days off in the next 1,5 months (vacation period), just to relax… So I will have to check the calendar soon and get it arranged.

So well, that was testing day one… On Thursday I have an appointment with Pdoc J. My mum and GF will be there as well. And after that, work of course…

I will be back folks! Thanks for checking out my blog/posts ☺

LW Rode roos

~ by Lonely Wallflower on July 6, 2011.

3 Responses to “Taking the test”

  1. 2 days to go sweety. You can do it!

  2. 3 hours of tests it is no wonder you felt stressed and had a headache, I think anyone would! x

    • It was a lot of concentrating, concentrating and even more concentrating… So it was just too much… Dreading the follow-up on July 19th. BUT I will have the day off from work then so that’s a plus.

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